I feel absolutely compelled to express my disgust with some of today’s television programming. Let me begin by stating that while growing up I was never allowed to have a TV in my bedroom. I still, to this day, don’t have a TV in my bedroom and most likely will not have one in the bedroom should I one-day marry.

This is going to sound rather pathetic, but I unintentionally forgot my phone at home Wednesday morning and felt completely beside myself.

I’m a bit of a hypocrite. To defend myself and my chipped, two-year-old MOTOKRZR, I used to tell people I liked the feeling of pressing buttons. One afternoon I attempted to use the Internet on my friend’s iPhone and frustratingly handed it back. I claimed I would never purchase a touch screen phone even though my KZR hardly held a charge, and I desperately needed a working cell that didn’t die during a two-minute conversation.